I’m one breakdown away from my roommates not wanting to live with me anymore.

 

I know when people are just being nice.

I’m nice all the time. 

 

I know what makes people disappear. 

 

The wildfire problems that won’t die 

no matter how much solution you throw at it. 

 

I make people disappear. 

 

Be an ocean

with an affinity for oil spills, fireworks

and beautiful homes. 

 

Too smart to lie to 

but too weak to tell the truth. 

 

What the hell do you do with me, so much accidental treachery?

 

I’m scared the ones I lean on are gonna drop me in the name of self-care.

 

Could I be the bullet shot through unconditional love’s skull?

One bad day away from being a lost cause.

 

Soon, they’ll bury my body with all the encouraging words

I was too stupid to get myself to believe.

Too stupid to apply. 

 

They’ll say 

“We tried. We wanted to give more, but he was just so damn needy!” 

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